That's what the director (and lead actor) was afraid of in the question and answer session after the theater showing at Montreal Fantasia Festival. What if his movie called "Suck" sucked ? Well it doesn't but it's not that great either. I'm not quite sure it's an humorous alternative for Twilight fans either (or people sick of it) as they're two very different beasts. Suck is a rock horror comedy with vampires. The only female of an unsuccessful band gets turned into a vampire and the band then starts gaining success because of her very charismatic presence. We see the band travelling from city to city, trying to deal with their changed band mate while being tempted themselves by the dark side.
Jessica Paré, the actress playing the female band member, is mesmerizing to look at with her white skin, pale blue eyes and red lips. One could understand the fascination she would create. The other highlight of this film are the roles played by famous musicians such as Alice Cooper and Iggy Pop. They're a bit longer and juicier than cameos but although they play well, they basically play themselves and nothing particularly challenging (except for Moby, a pacifist vegan in a surprising performance). I admit the crowd reacted very well to the film but a Fantasia crowd is quite generous with this kind of genre film, especially a Canadian one. I personally found it sometimes amusing but not hilarious except for a few bits (one of them being a visit to a convenience store).
Suck's writing did not impress me as it often felt too easy or cliché. The low-budget production had a Canadian and straight-to-DVD flavor to it. From a technical standpoint, it was quite bland with too many cuts from one head to another in dialogue scenes often making it feel as if the two actors were not even in the same place. The spinning vampire and the crossroads showed a bit more inspiration. The several musical numbers felt as if they were there to pad the thin story. To be fair, the original songs were rather good but it sometimes made this comedy skirt too close to the musical genre, something I'm personally allergic to unless Tim Burton is somewhat involved. I think "Suck" would be a decent rental provided you have a few friends to watch it with interested in the subject material and/or knowing the (in)famous guest stars. I think young Twilight fans, perhaps sucked into renting it because of vampires, might be disappointed because the vampires are lame (they have powers but not really shown) and the little romance there is kinda sucks as either serious or parody.
In Montreal, Joey is the lead singer of the struggling band "The Winners", composed by the sexy bass singer Jennifer, the guitarist Tyler, the drummer Sam and the handyman Hugo. Their incompetent and alcoholic manager Jeff is incapable to help them to reach success and they are on the road on tour playing in clubs and bars in Canada and United States of America. After a show in a bar in Montreal, Jennifer, who is also the Joey's former girlfriend, leaves the place with the creepy Queeny, who is a vampire, and they spend the night together. On the next morning, Jennifer does not meet the band and they travel in their hearse to participate in a rock 'n' roll show without her. In the last moment, Jennifer arrives with a different appearance and on the next day they find that their home page had had several hits, all of them with good reviews and compliments to Jennifer. They become famous and Jennifer great audiences to the shows of "The Winners" and one by one, the musicians are turned into vampires but the reluctant Joey. "The Winners" become successful and Joey has a dream where he meets the bartender (Alice Cooper) of their show in Montreal in a crossroad and the man tells that he needs to decide whether he wants to be a winner or a loser. Meanwhile the vampire hunter Eddie Van Helsing is hunting the vampire queen and tracking "The Winners" in their shows.
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