The Bronze


Comedy / Drama

The Bronze (2015) download yts


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Melissa Rauch as Hope Annabelle Greggory
Gary Cole as Stan Greggory
Haley Lu Richardson as Maggie Townsend
Thomas Middleditch as Ben Lawfort
1.23 GB
23.976 fps
1hr 48 min
P/S Unknown

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by Dave McClain 1 / 10

"The Bronze" couldn't even win bronze in a 2-way competition.

July 23, 1996. Atlanta, Georgia. The Women's Gymnastics Team Finals. The American women had never won team gold. They were, however, slightly ahead of the Russian team heading into the last rotation in the team competition. American gymnast Dominique Moceanu failed to stick the landing on either of her vault attempts. Then, her teammate Kerri Strug also fell – and injured her ankle. With the Russians performing in the floor exercise event at the same time, the competition between the two teams was so close that the American women's coach, Béla Károlyi, told Strug that they needed her to make her second vault to secure the gold medal. Strug limped to the start of her approach, then she sprinted down the mat, sprung over the vault and… stuck the landing! Strug then began hopping on her good leg as she saluted the judges before collapsing to the mat in pain. She had to be helped off the mat and later carried by Károlyi to the medal stand. U.S. Women's Gymnastics had their first team gold in Olympic history and Kerri Strug was a national hero. It's this story that inspired "The Bronze" (R, 1:48), but that's all that Strug's heroic act of self-sacrifice has in common with this embarrassment of a movie.

At the 2004 Summer Olympics, American gymnast Hope Annabelle Greggory (Melissa Rauch, from TV's "The Big Bang Theory") suffered an injury during the Women's Team Competition, but still managed to perform in her final event, helping the U.S. to a team bronze. She spent the next dozen years in her small hometown of Amherst, Ohio (30 miles west of Cleveland) living off her fifteen minutes of fame, in the home of her devoted widowed father (Gary Cole), depending on him for most of her support. She also gets free meals at the mall food court, has a reserved parking space in front of the town diner and she wears her USA warm-up suit everywhere. Hope's glory days – correction, glory day is an Olympic-sized cow and she is milk-ing-it! This might not be so bad if she were a decent person, but she's rude, foul-mouthed, promiscuous, dumb, self-centered and meanest to those who care about her the most.

Certain circumstances arise that convince Hope to train another rising Amherst gymnast by the name of Maggie Townsend (Haley Lu Richardson) and make sure she's prepared for the upcoming Olympics. This puts Hope back in contact with an awkward, but sweet local guy named Ben (Thomas Middleditch) who co-owns the gym where Hope is training Maggie – and back in conflict with an old enemy, former Olympic Men's Gymnastics Gold Medal Winner Lance Tucker (Sebastian Stan) who is now a fellow Olympic Women's Gymnastics coach. Besides clashing with Lance and being mean to Ben, Hope's jaded and selfish personality contrasts greatly with Maggie's innocent enthusiasm, but Maggie and her hard-working single mother (SNL's Cecily Strong) are grateful to have her services. Hope herself ends up having more at stake in this scenario than she ever imagined – including her own hometown hero status.

"The Bronze" is rarely funny and often ridiculous. In the hands of more talented comedic actresses, this might have been an entertaining movie, but as it stands, Hope's steady stream of profanities, unladylike antics and self-aggrandizing behavior just come across as comedy by pummeling. (Or maybe, given this movie's subject matter, comedy by… pommeling.) The script, written by the film's star and her husband, Winston Rauch, is content to portray hope as an unlikeable, one-dimensional character through most of the movie and first-time feature film director Bryan Buckley (known mostly for short films and Super Bowl commercials) is unable to tease much that is worthwhile out of his actors or the script. Worse yet, he allows some of his main characters to speak in an accent that I have never heard anywhere between the Ohio River and Lake Erie, and the only well-directed action in the movie is not on the mat, but in a graphic sex scene late in the movie that feels dropped in out of nowhere. Propped up by only a few laughs and a little sweetness, this film couldn't even win bronze in a two-movie competition. "D"

Reviewed by David Ferguson 4 / 10

Raunch from Rauch

Greetings again from the darkness. Leave it to the Duplass brothers (Executive Producers here) to turn the traditional sports movie genre upside down. Of course, this is about as much of a sports movie as Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story, but it does use the backdrop of the Olympics to make a point about fading fame. Mostly though, it's an excuse to crack wise, spew profanities and spoil anything and anyone remotely innocent.

Melissa Rauch (Bernadette on "The Big Bang Theory") stars as Hope, a former bronze medalist in Women's gymnastics, who captured the hearts of Americans when she battled through an Achilles injury to perform her final event. The movie picks up a decade after Hope's Olympic heroics and we first see her enjoying a clip of her big moment. And by enjoying, I mean … well, never mind. It turns out Hope never was able to compete again, and instead continues to milk her celebrity status around small town Amherst, Ohio. When her dad (Gary Cole) gently nudges her to take a coaching job, she shouts "I'm a star, not a coach!" Hope is a selfish brat whose egoism has her clinging to former glory and preventing her from joining society.

Hope gets tricked into coaching Maggie, the town's up-and-coming gymnastics prodigy. Maggie (Haley Lu Richardson) idolizes Hope and is her polar opposite in every possible personality trait – a very welcome upbeat and perky addition to the movie. Instead of embracing the opportunity, Hope goes out of her way to sabotage naïve Maggie's dream. Along the way, she also mistreats the gym owner who somehow fancies her – despite Hope's hopelessness. Twitchy Ben (Thomas Middleditch) is a sweet guy who sees the good in Hope and does his best to pull her from the dark side.

A twist of fate places Hope at odds with her old flame and former Olympic gold medalist, Lance (Sebastian Stan), who is now a leader in the world of women's gymnastics. These two banter like siblings who dislike each other, and also execute one of the wackiest ever on-screen comedic sex scenes – for all of you who have fantasized about frolicking with a gymnast.

Director Bryan Buckley is best known for his 50-plus TV commercials that have aired during Super Bowls, but here he lets Melissa Rauch do her thing (she also co-wrote the script with her husband Winston Rauch). There is some commentary on fame and celebrity (and cameos from Olga Korbut, Dominique Dawes, Dominique Moceanu), and some insight into narcissism; but mostly it's a chance for Ms. Rauch to flaunt her foul motor-mouth with some extremely crass and raunchy lines. It's kind of cute in an absurdly profane way, and some might agree it beats watching real gymnastics.

Note: Including a Doris Day song on this film's soundtrack may be the funniest, or at least most ironic moment.

Reviewed by Paul Allaer 4 / 10

Too bad it isn't nearly as funny as it is raunchy

"The Bronze" (2016 release; 108 min.) brings the story of Hope Ann Greggory. As the movie opens, we see footage of her at a young age trying to do cartwheels and other gymnastic related things. It's not long before we see her competing at the 2004 Rome Olympics, where, at age 17 and despite a severe foot injury, she manages, very much Kerri Strug-like in the 1996 Atlanta Olympics, to complete her final landing to salvage a bronze medal and instantly becoming America's sweetheart, most of all to her home town of Amherst, Ohio. Now, 12 years later, Hope has become an insufferable woman, obsessed with her moment of glory. But then, she gets an opportunity to coach up-and-coming gymnast Maggie Townsend, also from Amherst. At this point we're 15 min. into the movie, but to tell you more would spoil your viewing experience, you'll just have to see for yourself how it all plays out.

Couple of comments: while directed by Bryan Buckley and this is a Duplass Brothers Production, this is a Melissa Rauch movie all the way. Best known for her long-running role on TV's The Big Bang Theory. she stars as Hope, and she co-wrote the scripts (with her husband Winston Rauch). Almost from the get-go, the Hope character is so unlikeable, self-absorbed and rude that it frankly affects the way one can enjoy the movie. "I'm not a coach, I'm a star, I was in Dancing with the Stars, not Dancing with the Coaches!", Hope yells at her dad when the idea of her coaching initially comes up. What really surprised me what how raunchy the movie turned out to be. There is almost non-stop cussing and crude language. It's a shame that the movie isn't nearly as funny as it is raunchy. I will admit that there is one sex scene that is quite hilarious. It seems to me this movie is one big missed opportunity. You can see the potential, but it rarely materializes. There is some great song placements in the movie, including Britney Spears' "Work B**ch", Ace of Base, and others. And check out the song that plays over the movie's end titles, performed by Melissa Rauch herself and at her raunchiest yet...

You may have heard that "The Bronze", which opened wide (defined as over 1,000 screens) last weekend, completely bombed at the box office, and then some. It was one of the worst openings EVER for a wide release, and it's easy to see why. I had seen the trailer and was intrigued. The weekday evening screening where I saw this at here in Cincinnati turned out to be a private screening: I was literally the only person in the theater. I must say that the potential shown in the trailer never materialized in the movie itself. A darn shame.

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